5 Steps to Deepening Your Family’s Connection

By Tracy Liebmann

1. Communicate clearly, yet compassionately.

• Clearly only comes from your Authentic/True self, you need to be connected with your true self to be communicating clearly. When connected to your true self you are not acting or reacting from ego, inner child or your conditioning. You are communicating clearly because you know it is your truth!
• Compassionately means you are communicating with love and respect. You treat the other person or people the way you would want to be treated.

2. Be an active listener.

• Active listening involves fully listening to the speaker. Often we do not fully listen, we are often half listening or thinking about our reply instead of fully listening.
• Active Listening is a structured form of listening and responding that focuses the attention on the speaker. The listener repeats, in the listeners own words, what they think the speaker has said. The listener does not have to agree with the speaker…he or she must simply state what they think the speaker said.
• This enables the speaker to find out whether the listener really understood. If the listener did not, the speaker can explain some more.

3. Trust that the other person is being honest.

• Trusting the other person (when I say people or person, I am always including children!) is doing the best that they can with what they have to work with.
• Sometimes other people will not have the same tools that you have; the best way to “teach” something is through modeling it! So practice these steps, share what you know in a respectful way and they will follow your lead.
• Trust that they will!

4. Show love in a way the other receives well.

• What I mean by this is that everyone feels loved in different ways. Some people feel loved when touched physically; with a hug or a kiss. Others like to spend time with their loved one. Some people feel loved when they receive gifts and others feel loved through verbal communication.
• If you are interested in finding out what your love language is, here is a test you can take.

5. Have FUN with one another!

• Spend time doing what the other person/people like to do.
• Often in families where people are aloud to be who they really are, there are so many different hobbies and interests it may be hard to keep up – Yet, it is important to try.
• One person may like playing video games, ask to join them, learn how to play that person’s favorite game. Others may love going to parks or playing outside, make sure to take time to do that with them…you get the picture!
• Show that you know them, show that you care about what they like!

Tracy Liebmann is an experienced educator, Certified Family Life Coach, and Author. She believes deeply that great communication is the key to better connection with your loved ones. She mothers her two teenaged children from the heart, knowing that is where the truth lies when it comes to parenting. Her coaching clients describe her using words like; compassionate, caring, understanding, patient, insightful and intuitive. She lives in Charleston, SC with her husband of 19 years, her 2 children and many interesting pets. She enjoys being with her family, cooking, anything outdoors and being with her horses! You can learn more about her and her coaching practice at www.transformingfamily.com or you can get parenting advice with heart at www.asktracy.wordpress.com Tracy is a regular contributor to this blog, so stay tuned for more great parenting articles from her!